Feeling lost..

What happened?
Nothing at all..
Just lost..
No words flow,
neither able to write these days,
the sadness lingers,
not doing what is to be done,
not wanting what others want,
happy when with others,
but then the sadness lingers..
Just feel like going up to the smashan,
to the cremation ground or a graveyard
and sit there the whole night..
In the silence of the dark night..
Will i find you there?
Nothing makes sense yet again..
“When you don’t know where you’re going,
any road will take you there..”
All the roads seem so similar,
all disciplines of mind,
just training the mind..
What if i don’t want to go anywhere?
what if i don’t want to walk any road?
And still they keep pushing me down the road..
so i keep moving forward somehow,
doing this, doing that..
Look at the world You have created..
So beautiful, yet so incomplete..
What are we to do?
i’m baffled again..
Why can’t i just sit at Your feet?
Why don’t You dissolve me completely?
Why can’t i fly like those dust particles with the breeze?
Why still all these limitations?
When can i leave?
When can i reach? 

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