Reflections

Lost for words..

Just when you think 
you’re doing okay,
Just when you feel
content and good,
these people around
push you over from the edge
just with their words,
words alone 
like arrows lit with fire
aimed at you,
and you try to save yourself
from those arrows
but instead you fall down
directly into the steep valley,
the one you were fearing…
And while falling,
crying and hurting
and angry,
you realize
why do you even allow the words of these people matter to you,
why do you do the same mistake over and over again?
Nothing is ever goin to change
but still you don’t stop hoping..
How foolish!
And yet its too late when you realize
once again
that its never goin to change
you’re already falling
and hurt,
wishing somehow to stop this hurt
but all you can do is feel
feel the hurt and the anger
and not spit it out by saying something to hurt them
coz that’s the most you want to do,
but that would only extend the blame game,
leading to more hurt, more anger…
You want to run away
leave this place called home
but you cant
coz the right time has not come yet
Maybe someday you will…
But till then
all you can do
like every time
is feel it
blasting inside of you
and letting it out
in the form of tears
and writing..
And you feel so small,
you look out the window
wondering
Do i even matter?
At all?
But who am i?
No answer,
just lost for words…

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